Matt and I are 1 in 8.
I look back at our journey over the years and the raw posts I did on here and one good thing that came out of all of this is the awareness I raised. I will also remember the friends who reached out and said I did that too but I can’t talk about it thanks for your honesty, the people who reached out and said I never knew and all of that makes me proud. The majority of our journey is linked HERE https://www.okiealamode.com/search/label/infertility
For those of you wondering, YES I do still have all my “Participation Trophies” They are under my sink and when I come across them I don’t feel loss I feel proud. Look what I did, look at what I was willing to do. I made it thru that. WE made it thru. Infertility is very hard on a marriage. I have said this before and I stand by it, we were at our closest during all of this… yes a lot because Matt had to come home to give me shots, we had to make decisions together and mostly because we were working towards this common goal. And after going thru all of this we are still trying to find a new balance to US, still trying to find a new common goal and navigating the ways each of us processes this different.
I have talked a lot over the years about what to say and what not to say and we still hear it all. I do not mind at all when people have questions or even ask “What have you decided to do now”? That is all normal. But some people say …..
Why haven’t you adopted yet?
Don’t you still want a family?
Do you wish you had done a IVF #3?
And it goes on and on. I have said this since day one…. Matt and I are NOT opposed to adoption and never have been and we still can. But currently navigating life and figuring out if this is something we still want is complex. And adoption isn’t free.
I will say I am as nice as could be when people say “Maybe now that you are relaxed it will happen”… I smile and say you never know. BUT like this picture below “Just relax” is never well received by anyone going thru infertility…. trust me.
If you are struggling with this journey and need support PLEASE reach out to me, do you want to share your story? Don’t hesitate to ask anything. firstname.lastname@example.org