Hi Guys! I am always honest on here about everything and I am hoping that purging this will help lighten me. I am feeling really blue. It’s been that way for a week or two….much more so than normal..It is as if this huge weight is holding me down. And I cannot pin point it……
I feel like I need to get out of the house but when I do I want to go home.
I feel like doing something but then I feel like doing nothing
I feel like being productive and starting a “purge the home” project but then I have no desire to start
I go to a movie but can’t enjoy it because my mind wanders
I realize this is all do to the change in my life somehow, I do but that doesn’t mean I like it. I can spend hours here sitting at my desk in my home office thinking about what to do with myself. And then I do it all over the next day. And yes, yes….I am doing productive things around the home BUT I can’t really start any packing until this home is sold. And I just can’t bring myself to start anything.
I have cleaned my office, went thru files, cleaned the pantry and donated food, went thru pictures and scrap booked….you name it, I have done it. I wish the weather was enjoyable so I could force myself to go on a walk each day but I just can’t when the high is 20′.
I am lonely but I am not.
I have always said I am ok alone and I don’t feel like I NEED someone here but I just feel empty.
Matt is actually flying home this Friday-Monday at my request to help me with a second showing of our home….so that is good. But at times even thinking about everything that needs to be done this weekend exhausts me. My Mom has had a trip planned for a month or so and she gets here next Thursday night, so that is very exciting but currently I can’t seem to muster up any excitement yet. I know…….. Blah blah blah me and my #firstworldproblems but this is my life and I currently feel lost.
Woah is me. Maybe I will go roam the isles of Target again.